DEAR DEIDRE: DECIDING what to do with my wife’s ashes has been a mental struggle.
Every time I think about letting them go I feel like I’m losing her all over again.
My children are intent on spreading them, but I’m not sure if I’ll ever be ready to say goodbye.
I’m 62 and my wife was 59.
She died a year ago after a long battle with breast cancer.
While her death didn’t come as a surprise, it knocked me for six and I’ve been struggling ever since.
Most days my grief is overwhelming, and I find it difficult to get out of bed in the mornings. The only thing that has been any comfort is knowing that she’s near.
Any time I feel low, being able to hold her and talk to her has helped me get through.
The only trouble is, my children have been insisting that they would like to spread her ashes in the cemetery, so they have a place to go when they miss her.
I know that my children are grieving as well, but I’m finding this so hard and don’t know what to do for the best.
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.
Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
DEIDRE SAYS: I am sorry to hear about the loss of your wife.
Grief is a very personal journey, and for many people, keeping ashes in your home can be a very meaningful way to still feel connected to a loved one.
I’m sure your family would understand if you told them.
Perhaps you could even meet in the middle and let them spread a small amount instead.
I’m sending you my support pack Coping With Bereavement. This contains lots of information and resources to help you.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
I’m haunted every day by the abuse my parents inflicted on me as a child
Warren’s girlfriend has had enough with his jealous streak
Source: Read Full Article