DEAR DEIDRE: I FOUND out my boyfriend has been cheating on me with various women, including an 18-year-old friend of his daughter.
We were living together and he seemed to do a lot of overtime and getting home late, without being paid for it. I asked – not seriously – if he was cheating but he went berserk and dumped me.
I’m 29, he’s 33. We were together for two years. We each moved back in with our parents.
I looked at his Facebook messages on the day we moved and there was filthy stuff between him and this girl.
Six months on, he called me saying he’d made a mistake, asking if we could try again. Like a fool, I agreed.
I was listening to voicemail messages in my car a few weeks later and my boyfriend’s messages came up, as they’re synced somehow. He obviously hadn’t realised.
There was message after message to different girls, all disgusting.
When I confronted him, he claimed his account had been hacked – but it was his voice.
I can’t carry on like this but I still love him.
He’s turned into a serial cheat and I’m a serial idiot for accepting his excuses.
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DEIDRE SAYS: I’m afraid it does seem that way.
If you continue to accept the way he treats you, the more he is going to do it.
He doesn’t have any incentive to stop.
In the long term, this is going to do untold damage to your self-esteem. Tell him his constant cheating is wearing you down and it is over between you.
It will be hard for you but in the long term you will feel better about yourself for taking back control.
My e-leaflet called Addictive Love can help you to see this relationship how it really is.
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