DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN it comes to my family, my wife is a massive gossip.
But discussing hers is out of the question, as she likes people to think they’re perfect.
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She’s 42, I’m 54 and we’ve been married for 11 years.
I’ve always known she doesn’t value other people’s private lives.
But a few months ago, my brother went into rehab. He’s always had a problem with alcohol but it got a lot worse in lockdown.
My wife seems to think it’s OK to share this information with the entire town. If I object, she tells me I’m being silly.
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But if I bring up her mum’s dementia in front of friends, she kicks off.
How do I get her to stop?
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DEIDRE SAYS: Your wife clearly does not understand how much this is upsetting you.
Explain that just as she regards her mum’s dementia as private, you regard your family’s business in the same way.
Firmly lay down a red line that your family’s issues are not to be discussed as gossip, ever. And you must follow the same rule when it comes to hers.
If you are still struggling to get through to her, it might be wise to have couples’ counselling. See tavistockrelationships.org or call 0207 380 1960.
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