DEAR DEIDRE: IN September, my only daughter is getting married – but she hasn’t invited my partner.
She doesn’t like him because he cheated on me many years ago, when she was a teenager.
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She’s now 27 and I’m 52.
Although I have long forgiven him, she can’t. We still argue about it sometimes and she made it very clear he wouldn’t be welcome at her big day.
I dearly want to see my daughter get married and to enjoy her day as “mother of the bride” but I feel torn.
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Would it be disloyal of me to go without my partner, who is 55? And could my daughter ever forgive me if I didn’t go to her wedding?
The invitation arrived two months ago, but I still haven’t had the heart to tell him he’s not invited. He’ll be so upset.
DEIDRE SAYS: If your daughter won’t change her mind, you need to think about what’s most important.
You’re her mum – missing her big day could ruin your relationship for ever.
Talk to your partner and explain how torn you feel and ask him to understand.
Remember, it’s her day, not yours, so perhaps you should just go alone and then work on repairing things between her and your partner in the long-term.
If you want to talk to someone about this, call Family Lives (familylives.org.uk, 0808 800 2222).
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