A ten-year age gap isn’t so uncommon in relationships, but one woman in her thirties is getting fed up of people thinking she is her boyfriend’s mother.
Janine Adamson says she had always been attracted to her 24-year-old neighbour Owen Roundell-Prince, but given their ten year age-gap, felt that a romantic relationship was ‘off the cards’.
The 34-year-old fitness instructor finally started dating her young neighbour last March, but says they are often mistaken for mother and son and she has even been quizzed if ‘she’s mum’ while they were buying alcohol.
The duo’s age difference attracts even more hostility on social media, where people accuse her of ‘trapping’ Owen or holding him ‘hostage’ due to his youth – which Janine admits leaves her worried she’s too old for him.
‘On social media I get “you look like his mum” a lot,’ says Janine, who is from Southampton.
‘When we went to a supermarket once both of us didn’t have ID for alcohol and they said “are you mum?” and I was like, “that’s my boyfriend,” and she went, “oh, I’m sorry”.
‘It threw me a bit and I am scared that it’s going to happen again and I am scared that people think that when they see us.’
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Janine says this reaction makes her want to shower Owen with public displays of affection, so people are left in no doubt over their relationship.
‘It definitely makes me want to be more affectionate with him to save the embarrassment of being called his mum again,’ she says.
Despite this, the mum-of-two claims their age difference has its perks as electrician Owen brings out her youthful side and the pair are now expecting their first child.
However she admits she does ‘nag him like she’s his mum’ and sometimes moans at him in the same way she does to her 16-year-old son.
Janine says she posts videos in a bid to ‘normalise’ age gap relationships and that if she can reassure just one other woman in similar circumstances then she’s ‘succeeded in life’.
‘[People say] I’m “bringing him down, he’s got his whole life ahead of him because I’m keeping him hostage and he’s going to regret his life”, Then I’ve had comments about my son being closer in age to him than I am.
‘It is quite hurtful because having my own initial worries and fears, and I do now still worry. Am I too old for him? Am I not good enough for him?
‘He has got quite a babyface and I think I need to accept that it’s more about the fact that he looks younger than he is, more than I look older than I am.’
Janine, who is also a student, said she was drawn to Owen’s personality initially.
‘He was my neighbour for five years and I always knew that I was attracted to him and I could sense that it was reciprocated,’ she says.
‘But obviously because he is ten years younger than me and I got on with his family as well, it was just something that I’d always felt was off the cards.
‘Then we got closer at the beginning of lockdown last year [March 2020] and we were sneaking around for a little bit because we were worried what people would say – how his family and my children would respond, so we kept it low-key for a while.’
Janine says Owen is ‘amazing’ with her two children, 16-year-old Bradley Adamson and 10-year-old Maizie Adamson.
‘I always say that he’s my number one fan because he just used to laugh at me and I can be myself,’ she says. ‘I was a mum at 17, so I had to live a very adult life when I was younger, so I can be the person I’ve missed out on being.
‘The benefits of being in an age-gap relationship are that I laugh a lot, I’m happy and can be myself, which works because I do still feel very young at heart.’
The devoted mum claims she receives a lot of ‘comfort’ from seeing other TikTok videos about women dating younger men given she can relate to their insecurities.
‘To watch him have his own children is why I’m going through it again, because I never thought I was going to have any more because I’ve raised both of them on my own,’ says Janine.
‘But this man deserves to be a dad and I can’t wait to watch him with his own children as well, and for us to have that family unit together.
‘If you’re happy in your relationship and he’s making you happy, forget what other people have to say. Everyone can have an opinion and just accept that it’s their opinion, and that’s something that I’m learning and have come a long way with.
‘Obviously men as well, but I know women feel the same and we all share the same insecurities, worries and maternal feelings.
‘If I can help at least one other woman to feel like she’s doing the right thing, then I’ve succeeded in life because that’s ultimately what I want to do.’
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